Next Step

Came back from a work trip in North Carolina. The trip was OK.
Found a good sushi place.

I worked over-night yesterday.
It makes me feel like I don't have the balls to say fuck off.

I didn't keep up with the running schedule while I was on the road.

It makes me feel like shit that I waste my time doing shit that I don't give a fuck about.

Quit

I quit the soccer team.

I feel like shit.

Stroke of Fate

I thought about going to South Africa next year.

I think about what I lack as a person.
I was right about being desperate to gain knowledge.
I can see now why so many engineers never get any experience to do anything worthwhile.
It's hard to really grasp the consequences of the choices we make as an engineer.

I knew that I needed more experience and knowledge. Now I'm just useless. I knew what I needed, but I didn't get it.

I spent too much time worrying about shit that other people were worried about.

It don't mean shit now what I knew back then.

I'm just useless.